Robert - very quiet, very reliable.

To understand Robert it is important to know something of his background. His father Otto and his mother Else were first cousins. They shared not only a common history but also a connection to a large very tight knit family. They married late, and Else was 30 when Robert and his twin Stephan were born. Their sister Eva was born prematurely 5 years later.

Otto was one of four siblings born in Rosenberg, upper Silesia, the son of the first Jewish Lawyer in the town. Otto's brother Paul was the last Jewish lawyer in town. Paul and his sister Franziska, called Fränze, perished in the concentration camp in Gurs, France. This was ironic for Fränze, who had translated verses from the Provence but never had a chance to travel there, until being deported there from Freiburg. Richard and his 2nd wife Grete and their daughter Barbara perished in a concentration camp after being deported from Kattowitz, formerly German now Polish.

Otto and Else both died in Theresienstadt, Czechoslovakia, after being deported to that camp from Berlin.

Else was one of 10 siblings. Her oldest brother emigrated to Israel. One sister Käthe Görke and her husband Fritz died in a concentration camp in the east after being deported from Berlin. Käthe's twin George died during the war in Germany. The others were able to emigrate to England and all except Hedi died there.

Hedi came to the United States to live with Robert and Stephan and died after spending her last couple of years in a nursing home.

All this tragic history weighed heavily on Robert and made him cherish family and friends all the more.

Otto was a businessman, working for a well established firm, Rabbak & Gränfeld, dealing in iron ore. His work involved spending a lot of time in Russia, once for a period of several years. He spoke Russian and the twins were given the names of Russian friends, Andreas and Alexis, as second names. Both dropped these names on becoming U.S. citizen. Otto was a stern father, very concerned to have his children well educated and concerned for their fellow men. He did not permit them to use the public library, they would be taking books away from youngsters whose families could not afford to buy them. Any book you want to read, I'll buy for you.

Else was not well after Eva was born, so her younger sister Hedi moved in with the family to help bring up the children. She was a trained Fröbel Kindergarten teacher. Robert and Stephan were considered delicate and small, so they were taught at home by Hedi and only entered school in the second grade. Stephan was always rambunctious and often difficult and at such times Robert was admonished "you be good, and look out for Stephan". Robert felt this way all through his life, he needed to watch out for Stephan. The twins were not identical, but still in many ways very similar in their thinking and outlook. In looks they were very different. Robert with straight upstanding hair in school was called the Hedgehog, while Stephan with his curls was called the poodle.

Otto was the solid rock for the family at large, often giving quiet financial aid where it was needed. This trait was surely inherited by Robert who was often called upon for help. While the family was conscious of being Jewish and never denied it, there was no religion practiced in the home, just the ethical practices of Judaism. Robert first consciously entered a synagogue after he met me. In 1975 Robert gave me a present of Joan Comay's "Who is who in Jewish history" and wrote in the front on our visiting card "Mr. & Mrs. Robert Steinitz's Jewish History started Oct. 5, 1941", our wedding day. In the Steinitz home on Fredericia Strasse in Berlin there always was a Christmas tree and many presents.

Robert was born March 15th,1909 in Beuthen, Upper Silesia which at that time was German, but today is Polish. The fact that it was German when he was born most likely saved his life. When he applied for a U.S. immigration visa there was still room on the German quota, while the Polish Quota was vastly oversubscribed.

The family moved to Berlin 1914, at the same time as the Soewy's. Mr. Soewy was a colleague of Otto's and they rented apartments on the same floor. Their close friendship was carried forward to the next generation. The Soewy's youngest daughter Lore married Fritz Danziger and moved to Haifa. When Heidi and Michael, with Daniel and Susi spent 2 years in Haifa the Danziger's became their surrogate Grandparents. They were visited by Oma, came to Richards wedding and joyfully took part in Daniel's Bar Mitzvah celebration in Haifa.

Another great influence in Roberts life were the many siblings of Else who often visited and then played piano and listened to records. Else's youngest sister, Martha, lived and taught in Leeds, England for many years before the advent of Hitler. She often sent pupils learning German to stay with the family on vacation to improve their German.

Robert and Stephan were dressed alike until they started school. They were in the same class till they entered University, the "Techniche Hochschule", an engineering school in Berlin. Here for the first time their path diverged. Robert entered the program for Physics while Stephan opted for electrical engineering. This was quite natural as Robert was comfortable with theory while Stephan was more interested in hands on work.

He graduated January 19th, 1933. This graduation was already under the cloud of the Hitler regime. Nevertheless while he attended University in Berlin and lived at home he still wanted a semester away and managed to achieve this goal in 1930.

He studied for one semester at the University of Göttingen, which at the time was considered the premier place to study Physics. When Michael was able to spend a year in Göttingen during his time at Cornell University Robert felt especially pleased with this continuity.

In spite of the difficult times Robert went on to obtain his Ph.D., doctor of engineering, with a mark for excellence. Under the new racial laws it was very difficult for him to obtain this degree. Jews were requires to show proof that the family had resided in Germany for many generations. Thanks to the family tree dating back to 1797, he was able to obtain his degree. Just having the degree was a great help once he arrived in the U.S. and started to look for work. He did the practical work for his thesis "Ein Doppel Joch Magnet Stahl Messer" at the Krupp company in Essen. Krupp of course later became infamous for the work on weapons and munitions they performed. While Robert was there, there were only 2 Jewish employees, the director of research and Robert. George, the brother of his mother owned and operated a Pharmacy in Essen and Robert took his meals with George and Elly, while residing in a furnished room. It was a very tense time, as Stephan had been imprisoned by the Nazis together with his friend Ernst Zander. Ernst's older sister Käthe was employed in Essen during that time, and Robert and Käthe exchanged information and gave each other support.

Shortly after he returned to Berlin Stephan was able to obtain a permit to emigrate to Israel, then Palestine. The family felt relieved that he was safe and Else was able to visit him once while he was there. He had a very hard time in Israel, as did everybody else. The country was ruled by the British and there was a lot of unrest from the Arabs. For that reason the British imposed a curfew, which meant long evenings in crowded quarters as family members shared their apartments. Stephan for a while shared an apartment, consisting of one room, with Heinz and Ruth Steinitz and their toddler Rafi. For all these reasons Robert did everything he could to help Stephan come to New York, once he had arrived there and stabilized his emigration status.

When Robert finished his practical work in Essen and returned to Berlin he tried to find employment. This proved very difficult, and he was only able to teach at different Jewish schools. He was not trained as a teacher and found this very trying. He had earned a large part of his university tuition by tutoring, but a classroom of children in transition was a very different matter. The reason for this was that the pupil census changed almost every day as families were able to obtain emigration visas and other families sent their youngsters while waiting to leave.

During this time Robert volunteered to show a visiting friend of the family Berlin and after she returned to Switzerland he contacted her for help in leaving Germany. She recommended that he write to her relative, Professor Freund teaching at Fordham University in New York. Dr. Freund sent him an invitation to come and visit for 3 weeks. On the strength of this letter he obtained a visitor visa. On May 2nd he left from Berlin and traveled to New York via Grimsby-London-Southampton. He had wanted to visit Martha in Leeds on the way, but the British authorities would not permit this. So Martha came to London and saw him for a few hours. He arrived in New York on May 14th, 1936. He stayed with Professor Freund and his family for only a few days and then moved in with Dr. Ernst and Käte Steinitz who had recently arrived from Hannover. Robert had only been able to bring one small suitcase, but the family had come with a lift and moved to 94th Street on the West side of New York. Between all of them they had very little money. Robert only had the permitted 4 dollars and 20 dollars that Martha had given him in London. He started to look for employment and felt fortunate to find a position with Dr. Gustav Bucky, a Physician and Radiologist. He was also an inventor, and even today all x-ray machines are equipped with the Bucky diaphragm. He wanted an in house physicist to help with his research. Robert had not only found a job, but also a hot meal each day at noon. Dr. Bucky was extremely generous to emigrants. He had been practicing medicine in New York when he was asked to come back to Berlin to work at the Rudolf Virchow Klinikum. With the advent of Hitler he returned to New York and was doing well compared to most immigrants.

Out of work scientist used to make appointments to meet at Bucky's for lunch. There was always enough. Bucky was a good friend of Albert Einstein's and it was not unusual for Einstein and his daughter Margo to come and join everyone at lunch. During one of these luncheons Robert met Gehrhard Lewin. They became friends, and it was through Gehrhard Lewin that he later heard of a job opening at American Electro Metals.

Dr. Bucky made Robert part of the family, and took him along to Chicago to attend a meeting, and also on vacation in Florida, with Mrs. Bucky and their two sons. Mrs. Bucky was a writer of children's stories and had her own secretary, now Judy Fabry. Judy and her husband Joe are still our friends. It was Robert's first chance to travel in the U.S.

He worked on dosimeters and calibrated x-ray machines. He also calibrated x-ray machines for other physicians, giving him a chance at earning some extra money. He also taught a course for x-ray technicians. Because he was always sceptical when Dr. Bucky had a new idea, he was called "Jeremiah", a name that stayed with him when he showed the same attitude later on at work. Robert had hoped to pursue an academic career, but this proved impossible and he was able to adjust to life in industry. Michael's ability to achieve this goal of university teacher gave him great pleasure.

During this first year Robert only had his visitor visa and it had to be renewed every month. This resulted in the constant fear of losing this visa and being returned to Germany. He was advised that he could not work with this visa, so working at Bucky's was a good solution, somehow it was not a real job. Finally Robert consulted a lawyer who informed him that the employment at Bucky's would be an asset in applying for an emigration visa. Such a visa could only be obtained outside the United States. He made arrangements to travel to Canada and to see the consul there. At this point the Canadian government closed its doors to all such visitors. He had to start all over again, and tried Bermuda, but this door was also closed at the last minute. The last chance was to go to Cuba. The lawyer advised him to arrive in Cuba by flying boat, so he would look more prosperous and would have no trouble entering the country for the required 3 days of residence. In order to save money Robert traveled to Miami by bus, and then took the plane to Havana. He had very little money but wanted to see something of the city. So he boarded a bus and stayed on it till it's end station and then took the return trip. He did this in several different directions at minimal cost. Finally he saw the American Consul and obtained an emigration visa. He now could look around for a position that would pay more and found one with the Crucible Steel Company in New Jersey, based on his work at Krupp in Essen.

This job was still not well paid and when a position opened up at American Electro Company in Yonkers he took that job. It paid 60 dollars per week, a good salary at that time, and based on this income we were able to get married. At this time it was considered correct to pay one quarter of your monthly salary for rent, and apartments were plentiful.

This position opened a new field for Robert, specializing in powdered metals and magnets, as he did for the rest of working life. He later on obtained several patents in the field.

There were problems connected with this employment. The company was owned jointly by Dr. Schwarzkopf and Mr. Petcheck. Petcheck came from Czechoslovakia and controlled the money, Schwarzkopf came from Austria where he owned a similar factory in Reute. Schwarzkopf had hired Robert without consulting Petcheck, and Petcheck decreed that Robert had to go. Schwarzkopf said never mind, just leave by the back door whenever Petcheck comes through the front door. This went on for several months, made Robert very nervous, and everyone felt relieved when it was finally resolved. The work done at the factory, for instance the production of the proximity fuse for submarines, was considered vital to the war effort, so he was exempt from the draft.

Robert and I met at Dodi Zander's apartment in the fall of 1940. She had been ill and needed some care, and as Oma, whom she had met on the crossing from Antwerp, could not come I came.

From this time on Robert's story is also my story. We became engaged May 18th, 1941 during a Sunday picnic in Valhalla in Westchester county. My parents were delighted and accepted Robert and Stephan as their own sons. In fact shortly after we became engaged Opa said "if you ever decide to separate, we will keep Robert". For Robert, whose constant worry were his parents still in Berlin, having this new family was very good.

Robert and Stephan were living in a furnished apartment on West 79th Street. They did their own cooking in a limited fashion. I was away during July and August working as a nurse at Camp Pine Cone for Mrs. Schwarzschild. During this time Robert and Stephan invited the parents for supper. Oma wrote to me what amazing cooks they were. "They had potatoes shaped into perfectly round balls". Little did she know that they had come out of a can.

It was hard for Robert and me to be separated during that summer. But we wrote almost daily, and at that time a letter was delivered the next day. Almost every weekend Robert traveled to Tannersville by bus Friday evening and stayed at a small hotel near the camp. The cost was one dollar per night, and the bus trip took almost 4 hours. We tried to be very frugal with our money so that we could buy furniture and go away for a week after the wedding.

We were able to rent a one bedroom apartment at 9 Thayer Street, on the ground floor. Prior to Michael's arrival we moved within the building to a 2 bedroom apartment where we lived till 1957. We found Cantor Cohen willing to marry us in his study. My grandmother recommended him on the strength of his voice. She had heard him while regularly attending services at the Hebrew Tabernacle. Being married in his study was relatively cheap and there were only a small number of guests. During the ceremony we looked down at the carpet and noticed that the pattern showed a swastika. It is of course an old symbol often seen in carpets, but it still shocked us. When I went to see Cantor Cohen before the wedding, he asked me to tell him a bit about the family so he could make a proper speech. When I told him Robert's name he asked if he was related to Georg Steinitz, Robert's uncle. They had made music together in Breslau when both were young. He had no trouble after that to give a meaningful talk. We had budgeted 500 dollars to furnish our apartment and were able to do this, but in the end we had a choice of buying an easy chair, that Robert enjoyed till 1987, or to buy wedding bands. We opted for the chair and never regretted that we had no wedding bands, we had tighter bonds. For the ceremony we borrowed Opa and Oma's wedding rings, much to the astonishment of all in attendance. After a small buffet lunch at my parents house, Robert and I left for Washington D.C. October 5th, 1941 was the hottest day for that date in the history of the New York City weather bureau. It was over 90 degrees. When we came to Washington it was 95, and this was before air conditioning in hotels or museums. For that reason we cut short our stay in Washington and traveled by train to Asheville, North Carolina

Even when we were renting our apartment and buying furniture we continued to hope that Robert's parents would be able to come. It was the reason we bought a convertible couch for the living room. It was not to be. While we were in Asheville we received a telegram from Stephan. The parents had written that they could obtain a visa for Cuba for 400 dollars. We hurried back to New York and pooled our money with Stephan's and sent it. They never received the visa and perished in Theresienstadt, Czechoslovakia. This tragedy cast a shadow over the rest of Robert's life. I once tried to encourage him to talk about it, and he answered "Always think about it, never talk about it".

After we were married Robert commuted to Yonkers, where his firm was located, by sharing a ride. We felt no need for a car, until the boys were 10 and 12. At that time we decided to move out of the city, mostly for the benefit of Michael and Richard. We wanted to live in a community with a good school system, and I especially wanted a house with a yard, and Robert wanted a house with trees. To leave the city Robert learned to drive and we bought our first car in 1957. Then we surveyed the school systems in Westchester, to be close to Robert's work in Yonkers, and began looking at houses. We wanted a house large enough so that Oma could move in with us, as we did not want to leave her alone in New York. We finally found one at 21 Danner Avenue, in Harrison N.Y.

For Robert this was a difficult move, he had only lived in city apartments all his life and at first was reluctant to become a home owner. But he came to like it very much and enjoyed the trees on the property. But he was neither a handy man nor a gardener, so plumbers and electrician were asked to help out with chores. We always believed in paying for purchases and not taking on any debts. The first debt we ever incurred was a car loan. When the time came to get a mortgage for the house we had great difficulty as we had no credit rating, but finally convinced the bank that we were a good risk.

In Harrison we joined a reform congregation, located in the neighboring community of Rye, N.Y.

We had always had guests in New York, and in Harrison there was more space, and the attraction of the garden. Robert loved having company, but only in small groups. Almost every weekend there was someone staying with us. Guests from Israel and England came for longer periods

Owning a car enabled us to explore the neighborhood and to have a wider choice of vacation sites. Here again Robert's close family ties came to the fore. Writing letters to the family was such an important part of life that we always traveled with a typewriter.

Robert had always had high blood pressure, but only after we moved to Harrison did it become a major factor in his life. There were several episodes of extremely high readings and various medications were tried, most of them having unpleasant side effects. Periods of stress at work exacerbated this condition. American Electro Metals was in state of turmoil and Robert was made director of research. While this meant a small raise in salary it was not a good move. Robert was at his best doing research and dealing with administration was very frustrating for him. He finally decided to look around for another position and was happy when the GTE labs in Bayside offered him a position. Shortly after that American Electro Metals was absorbed by Firth Sterling and the Yonkers location was closed. Because Robert left before this dissolution of the company he lost his pension rights after 18 years with the company.

He enjoyed the work at GTE, which was Sylvania when he first joined the company. It meant a longer commute but he managed.

In 1964 Michael returned from his year in Göttingen and shortly after that Heidi followed him. To have Michael return with a German, Catholic bride meant an adjustment for all of us. But adjust we did, having brought up our children to make their own choices, Heidi and Michael were married July 4th, 1965 in Harrison and Heidi brought Robert and the whole family great joy. In many ways Robert related better to Heidi than he would have to an American girl. They had both had an academic German education, shared a love of Goethe and had similar experiences in different wars. Robert remembered being fed by the Quakers after world war one, and Heidi was also fed by the Quakers after the second world war. On December 21^st, 1967 Daniel Karl was born greatly enriching Robert's life. He enjoyed being a grandfather, especially after Daniel reached the age where he could teach him to play chess. He had also taught it my brother Ralph's four sons.

1968 was very difficult year for Robert. Richard had been in and out of the University of Buffalo, with the dread of being drafted to go to Vietnam prompting each return. All of us shared the view that this war was wrong. Michael was exempt from the draft because he had a child, but Richard would be drafted if he left the university. On Labor day 1968 Richard left to make his life in Israel. To see Richard, who had been spared from fighting in Vietnam, fighting for Israel in 1973 war was a shattering experience. For 9 years after Richard left we were only able to see him outside the United States. Only after President Carter's pardon in 1977 was Richard able to return to the states in time for Robert's birthday. We had emigrated to the United States and had come to appreciate its values and then to have a child leave because these values were not being upheld, hurt both of us deeply.

The second blow of 1968 fell the day after the election of Richard Nixon. Robert came home from work looking pale and shaken, "they are closing the lab". He needed two more years with this company to be eligible for a pension. The thought of once again losing pension rights was frightening. He started mailing out resumes with no success. Finally a position opened up at Wilbur Driver company in Belleville N.J. They needed someone with Robert's qualifications and they were part of the GTE Sylvania family. This was very important, as it would allow Robert to keep his pension rights.

Robert lost his job at the start of November 68 and started to work at Wilbur Driver January 1st, 1969. We found an apartment after choosing Montclair as the greenest spot on the map close to Belleville. The house in Harrison was rented till we could find out if we would stay in Montclair after Robert would retire. In 1972 we found a house at 111 Central Avenue in Montclair and managed to sell the house in Harrison. Robert liked the work he was doing

In 1970 he had the best birthday present, Susi was born on March 15th. Daniel had missed my birthday by one day!

We joined Temple Sholom in Cedar Grove and Robert felt more comfortable there than he ever had in Rye. Rabbi Patz understood us and our needs. When Hedi died in 1975 he had a special private service for just our families, meaning Stephan and Hilde, Oma, Robert and me. Hedi's coming to the States to live mostly with Stephan, and sometimes with us had been difficult. She had been so involved in his upbringing, and she was now gradually becoming senile. In the end she needed to be placed in a nursing home.

In 1974 Robert retired, he was physically ready to have more rest, but found it hard to be unemployed. He had hoped to do some consulting work, but it was not the right time for it. He did some tutoring at the High School, and at the Presbyterian Church for disadvantaged youngsters that were brought in from Newark. After the temple sponsored a Laotian family he taught the mother of the family English. The best part of retirement was the ability for vacationing in Canada with the family or in Israel. But the unstable, mostly high blood pressure continued to be a problem.

Travel to Israel became more frequent, especially while the Canadians spent 2 years at the Technion in Haifa. We came to Haifa for Daniel's Bar Mitzvah and then Richard's marriage during their 2nd year there. Robert was so glad that Richard had found the right girl and that we now had two daughters. He delighted in the two new grandchildren Oren and Yael, but he was always more comfortable with older children. He missed seeing them grow to this state. He had a number of very small strokes and the cumulative effect of these and a prostrate operation brought him to the point where he needed nursing care. As with everything else that had happened to him, he accepted it without ever complaining. It was fortunate that he could come to Van Dyk Manor where I had worked for 20 years and everyone knew him. But of course it was not home. With the help and advice of Michael and Heidi I decided to sell the house in Montclair and move to Antigonish. Robert could not be part of decision making but was visibly glad when the move was made. The addition built to the house at 156 St. Ninian street was built to his needs. Eating his meals with the family, and having them close by was very good for him. He felt at home with the same furnishings we had bought in 1941. He lived for 3 years in Antigonish, with a gradual decline in his health, and died quietly, as he had lived, June 14th, 1992.

While this may seem to be just a recital of facts, it is the best I can do, as I cannot possibly put down on paper what we meant to each other and how much I have lost.

Lore Steinitz, 1996